To Facebook or Not to Facebook: What’s the Right Social Network For You?

“You have to join Facebook, Margaret,” Heather insisted to my other fifty-year old friend after she lamented that she couldn’t keep up with what her kids or other friends were doing. According to iStrategyLabs in Washington, D.C., “the fastest-growing segments on Facebook are Gen Xers nearing age 40 and baby boomers pushing 60” (Scientific American Mind, Jan/Feb 2010).

Since its launch at Harvard University in 2004, Facebook’s memebership has swollen to over 250 million people in 170 countries and territories, beating out MySpace (with 125 million users), LinkedIn (a site for professionals), and Twitter.

The millions of social-network users are engaged in the largest experiment in social interaction ever conducted, says David Disalvo of Scientific American Mind (Jan/Feb 2010).

I started my Facebook account two years ago, in 2007, and confess I was initially on there daily, trying out all the applications, and I mean ALL of them, even the silly ones. I was trading messages, pokes, virtual gifts, insults, and all kinds of stuff with old and new friends. Back then, most of my existing close friends weren’t on Facebook yet—didn’t even know it existed—and I networked mostly with business colleagues and blogging friends from all over the world, many who I had never met. I had also joined three blogging communities, MyBlogLog and Blog Catalog and StumbleUpon. All three provided me with access to other like-minded people who also authored blogs. It was, in fact this community of bloggers who I later met again on Facebook, after we’d already established a good friendship through our blogs and associated networking community.


Social networks are an amazing way to meet and form meaningful relationships with people of like minds. Some networks work better at this than others. In fact, Facebook is a network that works best for people who already know each other. I don’t find it a good place to meet a stranger, per se, because it isn’t focused enough and doesn’t provide adequate filters. It’s like meeting someone at the local bar—without the benefit of having a drink! Now, where’s the fun in that? I’d much rather meet that person face-to-face, where all my senses are able to exercise themselves. That’s what I like about the blogging communities: everyone there is a blogger like me and I can go to their blog to find out an awful lot about whether they’re interesting and worth me sharing an online relationship with. My son belongs to a social network devoted to skiing. Of course, it isn’t just a sport; it’s a sub-culture. And that social network has allowed him to find a group of cool friends who share his passion, and speak the same language.

Social networking has freed us of the fetters and limitations of geography. It doesn’t matter anymore what side of the river you live on, or what you look like. What’s important is your mind and your heart. Social networks provide an even playing ground for minds to interact. I know of several people who formed a relationship online through a social network and have gone on to meet in person and become great friends.

So, Margaret… What are you waiting for?...

Nina Munteanu is an ecologist and internationally published author of novels, short stories and essays. She coaches writers and teaches writing at George Brown College and the University of Toronto. For more about Nina’s coaching & workshops visit www.ninamunteanu.me. Visit www.ninamunteanu.ca for more about her writing.